When I first started building SoloUno, I wanted to do one thing before anything else - talk to as many people with trichotillomania as possible. I wanted to hear their stories. What was their struggle like? What had they tried? What helped and what didn't?
Until that point, the only person I knew who dealt with trich was me.
So I wrote a post in a trichotillomania community online, asking if anyone would be willing to chat. I wasn't sure what to expect. To my surprise, many people responded and wanted to talk. So I started scheduling Zoom calls, one by one.
Three years later I still do this. Whenever a SoloUno user wants to chat, or someone from a BFRB community wants to share their story, I'm always happy to jump on a call and listen. I still learn a lot from these conversations to this day.
The Thing That Surprised Me Most 🙀
Going back to those first calls three years ago - there was one thing I really didn't see coming.
nobody fit any kind of stereotype I might have had.
I'll be honest. I felt a bit weird for having this habit, and I think somewhere in the back of my mind I assumed I'd meet people who were more anxious than average, or dealing with additional conditions, or carrying heavy trauma stories. I'm not proud of that assumption, but it was there.
Instead I got to meet teachers, students, parents, engineers. People with full lives, jobs, hobbies and families. People you'd never guess carry this with them every day. Of course everyone has their own background and story - but the main thing that hit me was that this habit doesn't require a particular type of person. Anyone can have it. Just like anyone can bite their nails
The Nail Biting Comparison 💅🏻
That's when it clicked for me.
When someone tells you they bite their nails, you don't automatically assume there's something heavier underneath. You don't think trauma, or mental health conditions, or anything like that. It's so common and familiar that it just... is what it is.
But with hair pulling people think differently. There's an assumption that it must sit on top of something more serious.
It doesn't have to. And mostly - it doesn't.
We Became Friends 💜
Some of those early Zoom calls turned into a weekly group where we meet up and catch up regularly. What started as user research became genuine friendships. Some of the people I met in those first calls, who later became SoloUno users, came to my wedding.
You Are Not Alone 🙌🏻
If you're struggling with hair pulling or any other BFRB habit - just know that many people struggle exactly like you. You are not alone, and you are not that different from everyone else around you.
You just happen to have this habit. And that's really all it is.
